Friday, March 1, 2013

Corporate Free-Fire Zone (Poem)

We hereby declare the corporate world
To be a free-fire zone -
     - Anyone in a suit is fair game.
   
Quit, resign and forfeit your bonuses -
- While you still can.
Before we -
    Drown you in seas of soda or -
    Nix you with nylons or -
    Choke you with chips or -
    Shred you like a free-trade agreement or -
    Lock you in a garage to asphyxiate on exhaust
           Like when someone fails at suicide in a movie
                 (Except we'll make sure it works on you).

We'll set your suits on fire,
    Maim your mascots,
    Slit your slogans,
And kidnap the cows that unwillingly
- Donate their hides to make your shoes.

Don't blame us for lumping you all in together
- All you clean-cut banker types look the same.

(Chorus)

We hereby declare the corporate world
To be a free-fire zone -
     - Anyone in a suit is fair game.